A hundred days ago, my husband and I said our vows before the altar of our Lord. If you were to ask me five years ago if I would be where I am at now, I would not have imagined this present moment. In fact, sometimes when I wake up in the morning and he greets me good morning, I would still think to myself, “Oh right — I’m married!”

Quite honestly, sometimes I feel it has not sunk in… but then again, it has only been 100 days. These past few months, friends have always asked us, “How’s married life?” Almost every time, I would mutter a quick, “oh it's great", or "well, it's new!" and such.

But how is it, really.

“It’s new.”

I have always thought that it will be an easy “transition” to the married life for Ryan and I because we have been together for many years, but I was caught by a surprise: I thought I knew him well enough; however, since we’ve been married, I have learned many new things about my husband! Don’t get me wrong: I knew what I was getting into — that the man I was going to marry was a man of values and had the characteristics I prayed for.

By new, I meant those things that you don’t really discover until you live together. And while some may think that you first need to experience living with someone before you marry them, they are completely missing out — being married (and now living together) gave us more reasons to get to know each other on a more meaningful level. While it could be difficult sometimes, I’ve learned that through those “new” experiences, we could still love each other even more. 

“You need to communicate.”

Talk about the little things. Do not complain, nag, blame, or accuse. Your spouse cannot read your mind, and you cannot assume the other person knows what you’re thinking or feeling! There will be some occasions when they will know something is not right, but one cannot always expect this. It's important to cultivate patience, especially when your spouse does things differently than you do — and even more when you think your way of doing things is much better. Ha!

Written by Karissa Factura.
​Photos courtesy of Karissa & Ryan Factura.

Have you ever met someone that made a distinct impression? I think most of us could answer “yes.” Maybe that person didn’t do or say very much, but in their very presence or being, they made an impact, small or large.

I first encountered a religious sister when I was in kindergarten. It was during Lent. Sister (the sands of time have eroded her name) was kind and gentle, listened intently to our five-year-old selves, and really seemed to know about Jesus.

Until that day, I had not yet understood that Jesus had eventually grown from the baby I knew in picture books to the man who would eventually die on the cross for all of us. I remember feeling surprised and a little afraid of this new revelation, but Sister’s gentle demeanour and peace about the whole thing made me think that this grown-up Jesus must be quite wonderful, and then I was very curious.

A quick online search tells me that Sisters of Providence of St. Vincent de Paul were nearing the end of their ministry in my hometown. Though I can’t recognize that sister from the photographs, I carry the memory of the day she illuminated Christ for me. I eventually forgot about her – in fact, this memory didn’t resurface until I sat down to write this story – but the imprint on my heart, the one about grown-up Jesus never left me.

It is thousands of small moments like that one that mark the lives of many of us who live in the Diocese of Calgary – churchgoing or not – and exactly why a day of prayer for Consecrated Life is something to celebrate. World Day for Consecrated Life was founded by Pope John Paul II in 1997. Men and women renew their vows of poverty, chastity and obedience in parishes worldwide.

“The vocation of consecrated men and women have been for our Church from her earliest days a living witness to the truth of the fact God alone is enough and it is ultimately He to whom we must cling now in preparation for an eternity of adoring Him forever,” said Fr. Cristino Bouvette prior to the renewal of vows at the St. Francis Xavier chaplaincy’s Mass.

Written by Jessica Cyr

The 28th World Day of the Sick was celebrated on February 11, 2020.  Saint John Paul II initiated the World Day of the Sick to encourage the faithful to pray for those who suffer from illnesses and for those who care for and minister to them. February 11 is also the Optional Memorial for Our Lady of Lourdes.

In 1858, the Blessed Virgin Mary appeared many times to St. Bernadette in the hollow of the rock at Lourdes.  Since then, there have been many miraculous cures and conversions attributed to the intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary at Lourdes.  

The Roman Catholic Church has a long history of founding and engaging in the provision of healthcare rooted in a faithful response to the Gospel call.  “After this the Lord appointed seventy others  … Whenever you enter a town and its people welcome you, eat what is set before you; cure the sick who are there, and say to them, ‘The kingdom of God has come near to you.’” (Luke 10: 1, 8-9.)  
​
The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) reiterates this call and says, "Heal the sick!" The Church has received this charge from the Lord and strives to carry it out by taking care of the sick as well as by accompanying them with her prayer of intercession. She believes in the life-giving presence of Christ, the physician of souls and bodies.”  (CCC, 1509.)
The Pastoral Letter for Catholic Health Care issued by the Canadian Conference of Catholic Bishops offers eight guiding principles:  

• First, the health care ministry of the Church is rooted in and modeled after the person and compassionate healing ministry of Jesus Christ, the “Divine Healer.”
• Second, like Jesus, the healing ministry of the Church is aimed at the health and well-being of the whole person: physical, spiritual, mental, emotional and even social.
• Third, the ministry of health and healing is an unmistakable sign that the Reign of God is close at hand, present in the very midst of our wounded and vulnerable humanity.
• Fourth, the healing ministry keeps every Christian in close touch with the deep mystery of suffering. In the presence of this mystery, every Christian is invited to become a sharer in the redemptive suffering of Christ.
• Fifth, there is a spiritual affinity between prayer and healing. Praying for those who are sick or suffering goes to the very heart of the healing ministry and thus to the heart of every Christian.
• Sixth, yet another essential feature of the healing and caring ministry of the Church is a deep and uncompromising respect for human life – from its very conception to its natural death – and an equally deep reverence for the dignity of every person.
• Seventh, the Church’s ministry of healing goes beyond the healthcare of individuals as such; it extends to the physical and social environment in which people live and work. This means that every Christian is called upon to be an advocate of justice and to help redress those unjust social structures that cause suffering to the disadvantaged groups in society.
• Eighth, compassionate generosity is also an important dimension of the Church’s far-reaching ministry of healing. Christians are expected to give generously whenever people in distant lands suffer some unspeakable natural disaster, a tragic pandemic infection, or a severe human deprivation. Charity begins at home, but it must never stop there! 
  
  (Catholic Health Ministry in Canada, A Pastoral Letter by the Permanent Council of the Canadian Conference of Catholic Bishops, 2005.)

​Throughout Canada’s history, many women and men, clergy, religious and lay, have dedicated themselves to living out these principles by providing medical and spiritual care for the sick. In Alberta, communities of religious women founded the provincial hospital system and delivered quality healthcare with a preferential option for the poor.  The first hospital in this province was established in 1863 by the Sisters of Charity (Grey Nuns) in St. Albert.  The founding of the hospitals spread from this beginning and fostered the hospital system we enjoy today.  We are all indebted to this rich legacy of faith, fortitude, perseverance and care of the sick.   

Pope Francis’ Message for the World Day of the Sick, “Come to me, all you who labour and are burdened, and I will give you rest” (Mt 11:28), offers comfort to the sick saying “brothers and sisters who are ill, your sickness makes you in a particular way one of those “who labour and are burdened”, and thus attract the eyes and heart of Jesus. In him, you will find light to brighten your darkest moments and hope to soothe your distress.” 
​
Pope Francis also offers timely encouragement to healthcare providers, “may you always strive to promote the dignity and life of each person, and reject any compromise in the direction of euthanasia, assisted suicide or suppression of life, even in the case of terminal illness.  I echo Pope Francis’ message and encourage healthcare providers “to be consistent with your “yes” to life and to the human person. Your professionalism, sustained by Christian charity, will be the best service you can offer for the safeguarding of the truest human right, the right to life.”

My hope is that our society – and each of us – will better recognize the profound human-ness of the tremendously important phase of life that we know as ‘end of life’ or palliative.  It might seem to be normal to fear this time, and perhaps to seek to avoid the experience of living when dying is inevitable due to an illness.  While we understand as compassionate humans the natural grief and concern that accompanies the possibility of dying, there are other ways to experience it – and I have seen these other ways in countless individuals. 

Those people have taught me that the time prior to their natural deaths can be a time of growth, of healing of relationships, of seeking and giving forgiveness, of preparation of hearts and souls for meeting their God, of internal reflection and openness, of teaching those around them through their example, even a time of profound peace and joy, and certainly a time of giving love unreservedly, and of accepting loving care from others while vulnerable and frail.

Society’s response to suffering is to enact a law that allows physicians and nurse practitioners to deliberately end a person’s life through the provision of chemicals that are specifically meant to cause death.  But suffering - whether physical, mental or emotional - can and should be a trigger for our spiritual and human selves to respond differently based on compassion.

All of us can protect and support those who are particularly vulnerable and who might otherwise choose assisted death as a way to stop their suffering because they cannot access society’s resources due to their vulnerability.

We should not be afraid to support conscience rights for people in medical professions.  We want people who are engaged in challenging health care tasks to be able to honour moral commitments for at least two reasons: a) so that they are not morally harmed by being forced to do things against their conscience; and b) so that they can do their best work for all the people they care for, by being whole to the deepest parts of their beings.  Since conscience rights are not absolute rights that prevail in all circumstances, supporting conscience rights can be done without impairing patient access to needed services.

Those of us who are able to, have a duty to advocate with decision-makers to minimize the harms of assisted death and to reject the further expansion of the criteria for assisted death eligibility.

We must do what we can to promote widespread availability of expert end of life care. The focus of this care is to reduce suffering from symptoms and also to assist people to live as well as they can as they approach the end of their natural lives. Palliative, end of life care has been so positive and helpful for so many people and simply should be universally available.

The very human act of dying and of preparing for death while we live demands a response that does not seek first to snuff out life, but rather that brings out our love for each other and communal support while we acknowledge the human conditions of frailty, vulnerability, uncertainty and eternal Hope.

A mainstay of Church calendars since the 5th century and a secular celebration of romance for more than 500 years, St. Valentine’s Day gives Catholic couples a mid-winter opportunity to show appreciation for beloved spouses. While some forsake the highly-commercialized nature of what they see as a kind of Valentine’s Day beast, others will mark the day with cards and chocolates. This year, three parishes in the Catholic Diocese of Calgary upped the ante. Two are holding Valentine’s-themed events and the third hosted a retreat led by a married couple who willingly shared with Faithfully a few ideas about ways to keep Catholic marriages faith-filled—and happy. 

Prayerful thanks

At Holy Trinity in Blairmore, more than 20 couples celebrated their Catholic marriages at a Marriage Promise Renewal service on Feb. 7. The event builds on the success of similar services Fr. Joseph Nagothu organized when serving parishes in India, Rockyford, Beiseker and Calgary.

All couples married in the Church are welcome to attend the church service, followed by a banquet in the parish hall. Like the renewal of baptismal vows at Easter, the marriage promise renewal invites couples to rededicate themselves to the sacramental nature of marriage and a deeper awareness of God’s grace in their lives.

The ceremony can be especially resonant with couples who are finding their way back to the Church and for those who’ve let their faith simmer to a kind of lukewarm temperature, explains Fr. Nagothu. He says past participants have thanked him for graces received when they took part in the service.

Parish council is onboard with their priest’s plans to make the service an annual event. “Next year, we plan to hold this same event at Holy Trinity on Feb. 14,” says Fr. Nagothu. 

In Strathmore, Sacred Heart parish organized a Wedding Anniversary Celebration for Feb. 8. The dinner and dance will celebrate marriage and raise money for the parish building fund. Organizers hope some of the 150 participants will come dressed in their wedding attire, says Simon Caron, a parish volunteer and a member of Sacred Heart’s fundraising committee. “The idea is to recreate the best day of people’s lives.” 

The Sacred Heart fundraiser will include square dancing, with a local caller adding to the fun, says Caron.

The faith/marriage connection

Couples who aren’t participating in formal events can use all of the largely-secular hullabaloo surrounding Valentine’s Day as an excuse to spark their own marriage renewal, says Donna and Jeff Garrett of Omaha, Nebraska.

The Garretts, who will celebrate 32 years of marriage this summer, were at Sacred Heart parish in downtown Calgary in late January to lead a two-day retreat, Your Difference Has a Purpose. 

The Garretts, who embraced the Regnum Christi movement about 20 years ago, teach others how to identify and explore their God-given talents. Retreat participants included couples, single people and individuals who came without their spouses.

Before the retreat, participants used the CliftonStrengths assessment tool to learn about their strengths. During the retreat, a guided assessment of their individual results led people to what Jeff calls, the “wow factor.” That’s the moment when people realize why they do things the way they do—and why that could rub some people the wrong way. “You solve problems with strengths, but strengths also become blinders,” notes Jeff. 

The family that prays together

Outside their work as retreat leaders, the Garretts say they’ve learned to make their faith a foundation of their marriage. “We pray together and that has evolved over our married life,” says Colleen. “In the early days, she prayed there and I prayed over here,” says Jeff with a smile. “Now, we really do pray together.”

The Garretts encourage other couples to value the sacramental nature of a Catholic marriage. “Our marriage is about ‘us.’ But it’s also about ‘us’ within the body of the Church,” says Colleen. In that context, her life as a Catholic wife, mother and grandmother calls her to see “how that means working to help the people around me become saints,” says Colleen. “I, as a spouse, want to see my husband succeed. I want him to be a saint.”

Jeff’s own commitment to the sacramental nature of his marriage allows him to live by the personal mantra, “give your best to your best.” 

The Garretts say their marriage benefits from sharing assessments of their individual strengths. “The other thing we are very good at is focused listening,” says Colleen. “And that costs no money,” adds Jeff. 

Colleen also credits Jeff with being very good at positive affirmation and they both take care to make sure that “we set each other up to succeed with our kids.” If a child shares sensitive information with Colleen, for example, she’ll make sure Jeff knows so that he can be similarly supportive. They’ve also learned to have interests outside their children. That was a tip they learned early in their marriage and Colleen says it’s served them well.

We would like to hear from you about the role of prayer in your marriage. Please complete the short survey. Your responses will be shared anonymously to help all married couples https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/FNCBDZ2 

Bishop William McGrattan sums up his first decade as bishop in two words: very busy. 

“One could describe it as being very busy and demanding, some would say tiring, but when I look back there has been a great gift of growing in wisdom,” said Bishop McGrattan.  

Since his episcopal appointment 10 years ago this past January, Bishop McGrattan has made dozens of pastoral visits to parishes within each diocese that he has served – Toronto, Peterborough and Calgary – to see what’s taking place at the ground-level. He’s visited 23 parishes since his installment as Bishop of the Diocese of Calgary three years ago this February. 

“I’m constantly trying to listen,” said Bishop McGrattan. “I think when you listen you can often discern and make some good decisions that can be far-reaching, have sustainability and make a greater impact.” 

Some highlights from his first three years in Calgary include: 

• restructuring the pastoral centre to reflect the mission statement: Forming missionary disciples in building the Kingdom of God.  
• giving assent to establishing GrACE: Grateful Advocates for Catholic Education which advocates for publicly-funded Catholic education across the province. 
• giving assent to establishing the St. Francis Xavier Chaplaincy at St. Bernard’s Church under the initiative and direction of Fr. Cristino Bouvette.
• collaborating with St. Mary’s University to revamp the permanent diaconate program and formation for lay ministers.  
• strengthening diocesan outreach such as Feed The Hungry and Elizabeth House. 

“I believe these initiatives can strengthen the diocese in forming missionary disciples,” said Bishop McGrattan. 

One challenge has been managing the limited financial resources of the diocese in a strained economy. In good economic times, the population has grown and the diocese has responded by renovating or building new churches. But in a sluggish economy, the financial resources of the diocese have also weakened. 

“We have sufficient but we don’t have enough to be building the churches that are required to accommodate new neighbourhoods,” said Bishop McGrattan.  

He wants to set a pastoral plan for the Diocese in another three years from now. 

“I thought I was going to do a pastoral plan in the first three years, but I think there is a wisdom in not forcing this type of initiative on the Diocese,” he said. 

“I want to have three years to work up to a spiritual and pastoral revitalization. We need to till the ground before we enter into a process of formalizing the pastoral direction and means.” 

In the meantime, Bishop McGrattan is using the information from the consultations with clergy in his first six months here to understand the challenges and priorities of the Diocese. 

Written by Sara Francis for Faithfully

To be honest, when they first pitched the idea to me, I was already fairly certain that it wasn’t going to happen. “Would you ever consider travelling to Brazil, Father, to learn more about our community and experience our life?” Sister Mary Elisabeth asked me one day. Immediately turning them down proved not to be so easy, but I had my doubts about going. 
After additional time in prayer, discovering an utterly miraculous open block of time in my calendar precisely over the days the Sisters had invited me - with the bonus that my friend, Fr. Nathan Siray, former pastor and a friend of the Sisters was also invited - we decided to take the plunge! I could never have dreamed what God was already preparing for us down in Belém. 

I have sensed a growing need to better understand the unique charism of the Seeds of the Word Community considering their expanding presence in our diocese coupled with the growing interest of our young people in discerning with them. After less than five years in Calgary, there was already a young woman from the community of Vauxhall living in one of their communities and my trip down was going to afford me the opportunity to visit her and have some of my questions answered. 

Alissa Going was in Calgary to attend a day of prayer and discernment for women considering consecrated religious life in October 2014. In walked two sisters wearing their distinctive blue habits and white veils. Who were they? Alissa thought. Later, Sr. Mary Elisabeth would recount that they themselves didn’t know what they were doing at that retreat. Upon arriving in Calgary their only concern was tracking down a parish where they could attend weekday Mass and were delighted to be greeted by the familiar and smiling face of Sister Diane Turner, also surprised to meet young, habited sisters in her parish. Naturally, she invited them to attend the day of prayer with her several days later. For Alissa, that series of chance meetings would change her life.

After learning more about their community, she decided to take up their offer to travel down to one of their houses in Brazil to experience what they call the Sabbatical Year. I asked Alissa to tell me more about what the year entailed and with her warm smile that beamed peace and her eyes closed, clutching her bible and notebook she said, “It’s a time when anyone is invited to give a year of their lives to God and let themselves be transformed by His Word in the heart of the Seeds of the Word Community.” She compared it to going to a year in Bible School or at the St. Therese School for Mission in Bruno, SK. The rest is history. 
​​
For myself as our diocesan Director of Vocations, and for Fr. Nathan as Alissa’s former spiritual director, it’s hard to describe the joy we received having the opportunity, brief as it was, to witness Alissa’s life in the heart of the Seeds of the Word Community, but to also be welcomed into it ourselves. Pope Francis has often referred to God as a God of surprises. He surprised me with a trip to Brazil; He surprised Alissa with her vocation on a day of prayer; He has surprised the Seeds of the Word Community with the welcome they have received in the Diocese of Calgary. I can’t wait to see the surprises He has in store for us all through these Seeds! 

Written by Fr. Cristino Bouvette

It’s been more than a year since I was ordained as a Permanent Deacon in the Catholic Church, and what a year it has been! Guiding me during the four-year formation journey was a combination of prayer, effective mentoring, spiritual direction, self-reflection and practical experience.

An instrumental topic to me, and that of my spiritual director, has been the transformation of one’s ego. Every person he says, “whether they are aware of it or not, is engaged from the moment of birth in a titanic struggle to lead a life led by the spirit, or, a life led by the attractions of this world. He is fond of saying, “throughout our entire lives, but most especially a man in formation must grow increasingly aware of these two forces, each clamoring for our attention. One force leads to life, and the other to death”.

The battleground in this great seesaw for our soul is a person’s ego. It can serve as both sword and shield, our greatest ally, or, our greatest enemy. The successful path to life sees the pouring out, a little at a time from our old self (ego), then, filling the void with the love of Christ. Thus, guided by this new mixture of love, we gain greater strength to support our future actions and ministries.

All throughout my life, but especially during my diaconate formation, I came to fully realize the necessity of allowing this constant pouring out and re-filling, as a catalyst to mold myself anew.  Following that which promises life, I opened my heart wide to the workings of the Spirit and allowed my self-identity to shift toward the truth of Christ. Infused with a clearer sense of the necessity of living my life closer to God, I invited my wife and my family to join me in this new reality of love. 

My spiritual director says that formation for a new deacon never stops and once ordained, the deacon must continually be open, and vulnerable, to the revelations which Christ wishes to share with him. A new deacon must continually desire to hold his ego aloft, so that with Christ’s blessing, it may receive further refinement from the Holy Spirit. This willingness to constantly seek to have his ego molded by the Spirit of Christ, this change of heart, is at the very core of diaconal formation he says. Without it, no man can truly serve successfully in the capacity of deacon.
​
This continuous transformation of one’s ego is key for us all. We must let go of doing things our own way, and supplant them with God’s way. One must pour out the old self (one’s former worldly attractions) to receive the new from God. Gradually, our willingness to seek Christ over that of the world is God’s goal for us.

Written by Deacon Laing for Faithfully

High on a hill overlooking fields of barley, wheat, hay and grazing cattle sits the little country church. It can be seen from miles around if you know where to look, and as you drive closer to look upon its tall steeple and red roof you might feel as if you’d stepped back in time.

St. Henry’s, founded by Fr. Albert Lacombe and area families in 1907, received a new coat of paint and a little more life on the fourth weekend of August when men from the Diocese of Calgary volunteered for the job.

“I knew it needed to be painted,” said Fr. Myles Gaffney, parish priest of St. Michael’s Parish in nearby Pincher Creek, “so I approached the Bishop who said ‘lets nudge the men’s ministries to see if they can get volunteers.’”

In stepped Sean Lynn of the God Squad men’s ministry. He contacted professional painter Dan Lebsack, and off to the hamlet of Twin Butte they went to evaluate the work ahead.

When a weekend was chosen, the two made known that volunteers were needed, and a few responses rolled in. Armed with a paint sprayer, scissor lift donated by a nearby Hutterite colony, telehandler donated by a Calgary carpenter, scrapers and brushes, and the God Squad barbecue and food for Lynn to expertly prepare, the team set to work.

Bishop McGrattan arrived on the scene on Saturday to see everyone hard at work, “I think it’s wonderful,” he said of the entire initiative. “The men are inspired to work together.” 

Bishop McGrattan was welcomed by the volunteers and members of the Historical Society of St. Henry’s who have assumed the role of caretakers of the church and cemetery since the parish closed in 2001. The Historical Society is made up of former parishioners, people whose family are buried in the cemetery and those interested in preserving the site, according to the society secretary and treasurer Lois Johnston. 

The group, who’ve been hard at work to keep St. Henry’s in good repair with much of their own time and resources – with the help of visitor’s donations – were happy to accept the help that came at the diocesan request. 

A few hundred dollars is donated annually by visitors to the site, many who come just to see the classic country church and surrounding views, and many to visit the cemetery and to pray and enjoy the grotto and Stations of the Cross built by Bob and Nonee Bonertz, just one of the families who’ve lived there for over one hundred years. 

Ken Wittkopf, whose wife Louise (nee Bonertz) grew up as a parishioner said, “We’ve talked about it for a few years, and we’re glad it’s happening because we don’t want to lose it.”

The value of this church to its parishioners was evident, as several who were not part of the painting crew stopped to see how it was coming along. As the painting went on, memories and stories were shared. 

“I was baptized here, had my first communion and confirmation here,” said Louise Wittkopf. 

Noreen Fischbuch told stories of having lived right beside St. Henry’s in the rectory, which was unused by the clergy at the time. 

“I had eight children in that house,” she said referring to the house mere meters from the back of the church, “and one day, we were actually a little late for church, and Fr. Kramer looked up as we came in and tapped his watch.”

Lois Johnston, whose grandfather Fred Klunker was one of the carpenters who built St. Henry’s emphasised the value of the church to the community of families who descended from those who built the church. Quite a few of them still farm the surrounding land. 

“My parents were married in this church, my family attended this church and my Mom was the organ player for years,” she said, adding that she grew up on the farm beneath the hill on which St. Henry’s stands. 

The general feeling from the society and volunteers was one of hope for the legacy and the future of St. Henry’s. 

“The big churches came from these little churches,” said Historical Society chairman Ron Schmidt, aptly speaking of the history of Catholicism in our country – it began with missionaries and settlers, from people building small country churches whose descendants fill the much-larger churches we see today. 

Upstairs in the choir loft, children were encouraged to ring the bell during the Bishop’s visit, and the sound was enjoyed by everyone below. Each person savouring their memories and nostalgia for the living and loving that went on at St. Henry’s for over a hundred years. ​

Written by Jessica Cyr for Faithfully