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Out of the darkness, into the light

6/2/2025

7 Comments

 
It’s hard for me to articulate fully a proper testimony to Jesus in just a couple pages. The audience this reaches is far too broad to cater to every individual, a lot of whom I care deeply for and with whom I have a long history. Many have a diverse and/or complicated relationship with religion. For some, it’s an essential part of life; for others, it’s seen as an ignorant abomination of society.

I understand both ends of that spectrum. I lived most of my life as an atheist—albeit a respectful one. I wasn’t anti-religion, but I firmly believed that science and logic had, and would continue to, erase any remaining mystery in the world.

Four years ago (almost to the day), I reached a breaking point in my life. Not my first—and certainly not my last—but a significant one. I have a long history of mental health struggles. I’ve been on and off medications since I was 20, in and out of therapy for years, diagnosed with this and that. I’ve battled alcohol dependency and suicidal thoughts. If you know me, you’ve likely witnessed this at one point or another. It’s been the undercurrent of every day of my life for over 30 years.
Picture
Baptized during Easter Vigil by Fr. Roque Pereira, Pastor of St. Patrick's Church in Medicine Hat, Alberta.
I cope, I grow, I manage—but it’s always with me. I accept that. This is not a “Jesus cured my depression” story. I still fight that battle daily.

Yet what happened four years ago was a call out of the darkness. I awoke in the middle of the night with very dark, troubling thoughts. I couldn’t shake them. I couldn’t fall back asleep. It was around 3:30 a.m., and I felt compelled to go for a run in my neighborhood. Running wasn’t unusual for me—but certainly not at that hour.
​

I put on my shoes, left a note on the table for my family, and quietly slipped out the door. My usual jogging route takes me past Saint Patrick’s—one of the most prominent and historic churches in Medicine Hat. If you're from here, you know it's a beautiful city landmark.

As I ran down the street, fighting the demons in my mind, I felt drawn to cut through the parking lot and sit on a bench—not from physical exhaustion, but from complete mental defeat. I sat there in the darkness, looking up at the statue of St. Teresa of Ávila. I had nothing left but to completely surrender and pray—either to be struck dead or to be helped by the Holy Spirit.

That cry into the void wasn’t met with the death I begged for—but with a radiant warmth inside me. It felt like a spiritual fire had been lit in my chest. A veil that had blinded me my entire life was suddenly torn away, like a bandage ripped from my eyes.

From that night forward, I began studying theology with the fervour of a hyper-focused child—specifically Catholicism, as I’d always felt drawn to its rich traditions and deep historical roots. I read works from early Church Fathers and Saints—Augustine of Hippo, Thomas Aquinas, Catherine of Siena—names that especially stood out. I read books by Bishop Robert Barron, watched his Catholicism documentaries, and followed his weekly homilies.

I began a loose but dedicated prayer routine. After a couple of years feeling the transformative power and wisdom granted through faith, I started attending mass at the very church where my journey had begun.

I went alone. I had no close Catholic friends. In fact, many people around me despised the Catholic Church—due to its troubled past, its scandals, and the way it’s portrayed by the media and entertainment industry. But I wasn’t deterred.
In today’s world, proclaiming any faith is an act of rebellion—let alone Catholic faith. I’ve always been the rebellious type. Judgment from others rarely dents my determination to follow my own path.

Last year, after attending mass for several months, I reached out to the church office to ask about being baptized and becoming a full member. Deacon Terry set up a meeting, and I shared the same story I’m now sharing with you.
After we exchanged contact information, he told me RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults) classes would begin in the fall—and that my name was now on the list.

From September to April, I attended the weekly classes, went to mass two or sometimes three days a week, and even joined the church choir. I now sing and rehearse with them weekly. Through it all, I’ve found an amazing community, new friendships, and unspeakable blessings.

The acts of service in which I've been able to participate in—both for others and for the broader community—have already begun to change my life and open my heart in ways I can’t fully explain.

On Saturday night, during the Easter Vigil mass, I was baptized, confirmed, and received my First Communion—surrounded by friends, family, and nothing but love, both around me and from above. 
​

Thank you all. Bless you all. Also, thank you for reading my testimony to Jesus.

Written by Justin Quinton for Faithfully. He was baptized into the Catholic Church at St. Patrick’s Parish in Medicine Hat during the Easter Vigil of 2025.
7 Comments
Trish Hickle
6/3/2025 08:19:54 am

What an inspiring story of God’s guiding this man in his faith journey! May 🙏✝️ as u continue to grow in strength, courage & peace of Christ’s love!

Reply
Colette
6/3/2025 09:06:36 am

Welcome home, brother! Thanks for sharing your story of hope. I am glad you “happened” to be so close to Him when you cried out that night… God does “not despise a broken and humbled heart”. (Psalm 51) And now you have Him living within you. Yay! I am so happy for your journey! Sending a big hug!

Reply
Madge
6/3/2025 10:09:49 am

Congratulations and welcome to our family of believers, Quinton. May the joy of this Easter Season, be your HOPE during this Jubilee Year, and far beyond. Thank you for sharing your testimony of HOPE as you reached out and followed the promptings of the Holy Spirit into a freedom that allows you to experience the love, joy and grace of our merciful God.. Alleluia, Jesus is risen and he walks with us on our journey too. Quinton, you were chosen, your life matters deeply, and you belong, thanks be to God. Pray for me too, please. Madge.

Reply
Pastor Simon Tracey
6/4/2025 09:40:16 am

My brother in Christ.

I have watched you journey through this and am so very happy Jesus walks behind you, beside you and in front of you now.

Your testimony is inspiring and reflects my journey to faith too (as you know)

I am blessed you call you my friend and even more blessed you call you my brother.

May the Spirit of the Lord fill you and guide you for the rest of your days.

Reply
Leisha
6/4/2025 11:03:41 am

It has been so wonderful to watch and get to know Justin on this journey. He radiates peace and joy with gentle humility. He is such a gift to the Body of Christ. We are so grateful for his kerygma - his proclamation of Faith, and that God led him to St.Patrick's. Welcome Home Justin!

Reply
Kristine
6/4/2025 11:09:06 am

Dear Justin,

Welcome to the Catholic Church. I too am a graduate
of the RCIA, class of 2006.
I felt called my God to join the church. I had no formal religion my whole life, that changed that Easter. It was 5 days prior to my 32 Birthday that I recieved the sacraments. I can relate to your story, I too have struggled for many years with depression and Anxiety.
God is the reason I am here today. I, like you, spend a lot of time studying my Faith and reading the works of the Saints. You are definitely not alone. We, your brothers and sisters in Christ, are here for you. Congratulations and welcone to the Catholic Faith!

Reply
Melvin
6/4/2025 12:58:29 pm

Thank you for sharing your conversion story Justin. It is by the grace of God that you were able to face your struggles and do an act of surrender. To share it is a humble and a courageous thing to do. God bless you. Keep the faith and let Jesus heal you.

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