Fr. John (JP) Luxbacher, LC: ​Make my heart like Yours

My 25 years of priesthood have given me the privilege of witnessing that Jesus is alive and present, seeking us out. It is He who comforts us in the Anointing of the Sick when life is coming to an end; it is He who gives new life to children in Baptism; it is He who speaks through His Church; it is He who continues to call us to holiness—and some of us to serve Him as priests. He wants our souls to be well because He wants us to be well.

​Born in Etobicoke, Ontario, to an Austrian immigrant father and a Dutch immigrant mother, I began attending daily Mass at a young age, following in the footsteps of my older brother Michael, who is also a priest, currently serving in the United States. My mom converted to Catholicism when she met my dad, and they both attended catechism, what is now “RCIA.”  Growing up, the faith was unassumingly central. Saturday evening Mass at our local parish and Sunday Mass at the ethnic German parish downtown were constants throughout our childhood. 

 On Sundays, it was never, “Oh, it is a nice day today—maybe we should go to the beach instead of Church.” It was always, “It is a lovely day, so let’s go to the beach today—right after Mass!”

​Looking back, I deeply appreciate, too, how the day ended with Mom reading the Children’s Bible or fairy tale bedtime stories, followed by Lives of the Saints and prayers. There was a kind of easy familiarity with the Church, as Jesus’ house.
My brother had always wanted to be a priest. He visited and joined the Legion of Christ seminary in 1989. Although I had always been around the Church, no one had ever asked whether I was considering priesthood, but when I visited my brother at the seminary in Cheshire, CT, it planted the seed of a vocation. During that first year at university, I remember thinking: “Of the 50,000 students here, how many have ever thought about the priesthood? How many are still considering it?” Perhaps somewhat pessimistically, I concluded that probably not more than a handful. And then I thought: “If I don’t give God a chance, with all my interest in the faith… well, then, who will?” I entered the Novitiate that fall.

What I most appreciate from my years in the seminary was learning to have a real, interactive relationship with Jesus. We were taught to spend a quiet, attentive hour each morning in personal dialogue with Him: speaking, listening, reflecting, resolving. Although I had been around the Church my whole life, this was something new for me. There are many ways we can hear His voice, but it is different to hear Him from “inside.”

That little experience has stayed with me. God calls each person personally, but sometimes He uses another person to help us hear the call. My brother’s vocation helped me discover mine. As a priest, most of my years were spent as an instructor of novices, teaching young men as they began the path toward religious life and priesthood. Then, for seven years before coming to Calgary, I served on our Seminary Formation Staff in Rome. That was a true privilege: to accompany generous young men who had so many other options, yet were willing to follow Jesus and dedicate their lives to serving others. What is especially rewarding is seeing those seminarians now being ordained priests themselves.
Very early in my journey, a wise priest told me: “You are light, but you also need to be warmth.” I have never forgotten that. It captures something of the challenge of being a priest: to love and proclaim the Truth, but also to love people—to love their wellbeing, to love their souls, and not wield the truth like a battle-axe. Some of the most beautiful hours of a priest’s life are in the confessional: there you see, first-hand, that Jesus is alive and present, raising souls up out of darkness and gloom and fear into radiance and freedom and joy.

In this aspect, as in so many others, we look towards Jesus and try to develop a heart like His. My parishioners may know that my favourite (even if very short) prayer is: Jesus, make my heart more like Yours! A heart that is meek, humble, pure, patient, generous, forgiving, strong… a heart like His.
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After 25 years, I can say that the priesthood has become more beautiful to me, not less. There is deep joy in giving oneself to Christ and in offering Him a fatherly heart to serve the young and the old, the newly married, and those who mourn. Everyone needs a sign that the Living God is real, that He has not forgotten them, and that He is still seeking them out.
As I celebrate 25 years as a priest, I ask you to pray for me and my brother priests, for our diocesan renewal, and especially for vocations. May we priests always radiate something of the joy that comes from following Christ. And may our lives help others discover what I continue to see throughout these 25 years: Jesus is alive. He is risen. He wants us to be well. He seeks us out, desiring to raise us up.

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Submitted by Fr. JP Luxbacher, LC. We thank Solomon Ip for coordinating this jubilarian feature and helping collect stories and materials.​ Photos courtesy of Fr. Iqbal Kurshid. ​